One Hundred Nineteen: Sneaky Harmless Omissions in Marriage

“Not only our actions, but also our omissions, become our destiny.” – Abraham Verghese

Tuesday, April 29th

My husband hates to watch movies that I’ve already watched. We started watching a foreign film last night, and it was clear within the first five minutes that the main characters’ young daughter dies – my husband declared he didn’t need to watch any more of this film or other films like it with such a unfathomably sad premise. So we put in a plucky romance that was a film I’d already seen and had every intention of watching on an evening when he was out.

Now this wasn’t a huge omission, but if you’ve ever watched a film with my husband and I you will know how much we talk through the plots of movies together. We dote on the idea of one day having our own commentaries available on DVDs…since we can literally talk from one end of a movie to the other. About the paltry choice of casting. The terrible accents that detract from the story. The predictable plot or the surprise ending. 

All these comments were closed up inside since I couldn’t let on in any way that I’d ever seen this film before. Then my silence made it more painfully obvious to me that I had, in fact, actually seen it. I picked apart this film and found flaws while my husband seemingly seemed to enjoy the rom-com. Even though he started the film by claiming that this was a “Hallmark film that would make his wife cry”, he seemed touched by the sentimentality. There is a slight chance that he knew what was going on all along, but I am not going to bring it up from here on in. I have resigned myself to watching romantic comedies and period films on my own.

Is it so bad to omit (seemingly) harmless details?

More…

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